Vice Presidential Candidate for Bernie Sanders Debuts At Portland Rally. Implores Hysterical Crows, er Crowd, to “Feel the Wind Beneath My Wings” and “Rise to the Occasion”.

I have been waiting and waiting for either Hillary or Bernie to announce their running mate and though rumor is she was off with her timing, it appears Elizabill Surein is in fact, Bernie Sanders running mate. A female finch of 3.7 years, Elizabill refused to apologize for standing up her possible new boss in what appeared to be near hysteria following her debut.

Mrs. Surein, somewhat preoccupied with three little ones still in the nest (literally), has already made it clear that she will coordinate with Birdie Sanders regarding her priorities but she does insist one of them will be
insuring the rights of birds all over the world to raise their families in safe and secure environments so that they may rise to lofty heights as adults. She is also patently anti-pesticide and feels a world-wide conference should be held regarding bird banding and mist netting. Lifting her tiny bird leg, she pointed out how difficult it was to get a band with “JC451” off her leg. “Eventually it did fall off but we resent being just a number.”

Tweet on the street is Sanders has officially asked Elizabill to join him on the campaign trail. Asked if he can handle the hysteria for his new running mate, Sanders replied, “are you kidding?” Elizabill plans to fly in to join him in between regurgitating with the little ones.

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